Vulnerability is a tricky thing. It’s hard to know what to share, when to share it, and who to share it with. It can bring criticism or it can bring connection. I think we struggle in silence because there’s a great deal of embarrassment that gets involved when things aren’t perfect. It feels easier to retouch our photos and our stories and present the best.
I said in my last post that I am most inspired by people that are bravely honest. Others flock to them because there is something so powerful about vulnerability – laying it all out on the table, and then handling it with great integrity and dignity. Oversharing is not the answer, but intentionally revealing yourself – taking your mask off – for others to understand who you are and where you’ve been, is a beautiful thing.
Vulnerability is not sharing every thought on your mind. It is sharing your journey.
Vulnerability is not weakness. It’s recognition.
Vulnerability is not being exposed. It is being authentic.
Vulnerability is not for attention. It is for support.
Vulnerability is not airing of grievances. It is being honest about personal struggles.
Vulnerability is not complaining. It is reflecting on difficult emotions and circumstances.
Vulnerability is not answering a lot of questions. It is answering the right questions.
Vulnerability is not an exercise. It is a connection.
Vulnerability is not narcism. It is being fully known.
We can use these statements as filters before sharing to check our intentions and protect our hearts. If we are genuinely sharing to be vulnerable, it can be easier to have perspective if criticized. I share so that someone else in an abusive situation can know that they are not alone. When criticism is presented, I remind myself of the women (and men) that find comfort and camaraderie, and I don’t have to be consumed.
The effects of sharing my story of abuse have been greater than I could’ve imagined. I found an incredible online community that trusts me with their stories and encourages me. Every time I write, my healing goes deeper and wider. New areas for growth are revealed. The victim mentality lost its power over me, and I walk in confidence and strength.
If you feel nervous to share, remember that vulnerability doesn’t mean bearing it all to all. Start small. Just be honest. Show one piece at a time. Keep in mind that vulnerability does not only apply to difficulties. Many times, it can be just as challenging to share our triumphs. We can feel braggy or undeserving of accolades.
Vulnerability is just as much about celebrating yourself as it about revealing your struggles.
Whether we are vulnerable about praiseworthy or difficult things, we are allowing others to see more parts of who we really are. And that is what it is all about. Being fully known. That is when the opportunity for unconditional love is presented, and people will accept it. They will not always do it perfectly, but at least you are allowing them to try.
I’ll say it again: Love someone today by listening. Love yourself by allowing others to hear you.
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