What is justice? I’m not sure that I can really answer that. But what I do know is that it doesn’t involve me inflicting or wishing pain on another person. My hurt won’t lessen if they hurt. I’m not guaranteed an apology or remorse. I can’t force care or concern. Some days, it can incredibly difficult to accept that the world is not just, and I can’t make it be.
On the other hand, I also know that I am allowed to want justice. I am allowed to look at wrongdoing and desire for something to change. But it’s complicated to know what that change should be. I never want to get political on this blog, but I will say that I wish the penal system was viewed more as a way to rehabilitate people than simply punish or prevent. It may be naïve, but I think every effort should be made to help growth instead of focusing on taking away.
I don’t think that there is a one size fits all approach to justice. Even two people committing the same crime likely did it for different reasons, came from different backgrounds, have different capacities to change, and hold different levels of remorse. Justice is complex. Like I said in my last post, the only thing I can really discern is that my default thoughts about what should be done are actually along the lines of revenge, not what is fair or would restore righteousness.
What I have decided about justice is that it is not mine to administer. I can desire it, but the justest thing that I can do for myself is to let go of control of it. For me, that means releasing it to God’s hands (of course, if the offense breaks the law, you have every right to place it in the hands of the judicial system). Everything that I understand about God leads me to believe that not only does He value justice, but He is the most capable of administering it.
I believe that God’s justice is not something our human minds will ever be able to predict, make sense of, fully see, understand, or agree with. His ways are unfathomably higher than ours on this one.
Instead of always focusing on how God will bring justice to my ex, I focus on the justice that He is bringing to me. He is redeeming my pain. He shines favor and pours blessing on my life. He continually speaks new promises over me and upholds old ones. My favorite passage of scripture for my entire life has been Romans 5:1-11. I only recently began to feel the depth of its connection to justice when my soul longs for it to come against others. He won’t bring harm, but He certainly will bring good.
What I am going to say next may not be popular, and it sure isn’t easy, but it is has been my way of releasing justice to Jesus and understanding that I will not be able to make sense of how He manages it.
I pray that God would give me His eyes to be able to see the man that He sees when looking at my ex; the broken, hurting, in need of mercy and redemption man. I pray for healing in his life. I pray that Jesus never stops chasing after him. I pray that Jesus would show me the hurt overtaking him to cause such behavior. I pray for change in him. It is an incredibly hard prayer.
How do you see someone that brought such hurt and injustice to your life as deserving grace? How do you recognize that [he] needs love, support, healing, and hope? How do you see [him] as a valued child of God? It can feel impossible to come to terms with the fact that [he] deserves anything, but God wants [his] heart too. Jesus died for EVERYONE. Grace doesn’t go one way. Forgiveness is for [him] too.
Check out this prayer on justice of pain.
As with every post, I reserve the right to learn more, experience more, grow more, and live more. I hope that I will always be gaining new understanding and learning new compassion for myself and others. If you have a different point of view or insight to add, please leave a comment. Every point of pain is complex, and I can only write from where I am at.
I welcome hearing where you are and hope we can heal together. Thanks for being part of my journey.